Expectations and Disappointments
At what age are men ready for adult relationships? Are we, as women, unrealistic in our expectations?
I've been thinking about that a lot lately. Am I been unreasonable in expecting my partner to consider myself and my daughter? Or is it perfectly normal and expected for a guy to think only of his own wants and needs? Or is this just a symptom of someone who's simply not ready for a adult relationship?
This evening a friend and I asked 3 different guys with ages ranging from 19 to 34 if they were really ready for a real life adult relationship if one presented itself to them. They all answered either no or not sure. When do they know they're ready? How do they know?
Maybe I'm deluding myself and waiting for something that'll never happen? Perhaps I should just make my plans only factoring myself and my daughter into them? And anything else will be a bonus?
I've been thinking about that a lot lately. Am I been unreasonable in expecting my partner to consider myself and my daughter? Or is it perfectly normal and expected for a guy to think only of his own wants and needs? Or is this just a symptom of someone who's simply not ready for a adult relationship?
This evening a friend and I asked 3 different guys with ages ranging from 19 to 34 if they were really ready for a real life adult relationship if one presented itself to them. They all answered either no or not sure. When do they know they're ready? How do they know?
Maybe I'm deluding myself and waiting for something that'll never happen? Perhaps I should just make my plans only factoring myself and my daughter into them? And anything else will be a bonus?
posted by eMMa at 1:12 AM
3 Comments:
I can't relate with this LaRa. Only because I've been married for 20 years. Married young.
Anyway.
I have a question. I borrowed a music CD from my library. I didn't save the disc in time to remember to get the info to ask you. Is there an artist that goes by the name Oceana?
It is New Zealand music and I love it! The chants are blood-pumping awesome! The voice of the female singer as exquisite!
And the movie, the Whale Rider.
My library has a movie discussion group that I joined. That film, I was amazed to find out was also based on some of New Zealand's tribal customs. It was amazing to see the different greeting customs. And artwork. Your country is rich in cultrue and history. And if your speech pattern is like those in the movies..absolutely delightful and beautiful! I wish I knew more. You are so lucky to live where you do.
I'm sure it's not perfect. No where is..but Wow!!!!
Had to let you know.
Is this it?
http://www.hinewehi.com/oceania.cfm
I kinda liked the song that she wrote about her disabled daughter.
I've seen the Whale Rider. It was set on the East Coast on New Zealand. Most of the cultural stuff is pretty accurate, I think.
How young were you when you got married?
Yes! That's Her!! Oceania I is the one I borrowed. It's beautiful. She sings in the New Zealand language so I have no idea what she's singing. But I love the beat, the instruments, and the sound of the language. I wish I knew what was being said.
Thank you for the link.
And thanks for answering my questions.
As for me,
I met my DH when I was 3 months shy of 19. Married at 21. I will tell you , I wasn't looking for anyone. I was too busy having fun with my friends. Dating was OK, but wasn't a big drive for me. Fun was. I still shake my head when I remember how fast things went. You just never know.
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