Catch the thoughts running through my head?
I am wondering again what I'm doing back in the world of cyber space. Those couple of months without a computer were good. I spent more time with my friends and family, did a major spring clean of my home and was just generally more content. Not saying I didn't miss a small group of people I do consider my friends, rather than just associates, on here. Plus I really missed this place.
Though I must admit I'm finding this place rather confining at present. I had something really important happen in my life last week and something incredibly exciting is going to happen soon. Yet I don't feel comfortable discussing them here. Why? Because my online associates know of this place and I know some of them come here looking for 'the dirt'. Surely they understand that everything I publish here is something I've made a conscious decision to put out to them and whomever else chooses to read it.
I'm not going to bang on about spys and lurkers. This is a public blog, I want it to be read. Just some things, 'heart issues' don't need to be put out there for public scrutiny.
I had another learning curve over the past few days. Religion is one big messy, controversial motherfucking subject! By the way 'motherfucker' is my word of the week, impressive, hmm? Silly me thought I could have an open discussion with people about our beliefs. Anyways what I've learnt is to keep my mouth shut unless I'm prepared to be labeled judgmental for staying true to what I believe. It kind of makes me laugh. Don't people realize that making judgments is how we as humankind make decisions?
We take the information, evaluate it, see how it fits with our morals, beliefs, experiences and knowledge, then either embrace or discard. Is that a bad thing? Of course not! Its how we make decisions that are best for us.
This leads me to another BIG questionmark in my life....BDSM vs God. How does it fit? Does it fit? If it doesn't, which am I prepared to lose? Actually, I know the answer to that one. I want to know how it works.
I also want to know where I can buy a blow up sheep. But that's another story.
So back to why I'm online. I know a lot of it is 'the new house rules'. Which I hate with a passion, but have no control over and have to live with, along with the 'house' in question. So it leaves me bored and alone waaaaaay too much. Ideally I would have a new job, but I really don't see any point looking for one this close. So I guess I'm just biding time.
At the moment I'm doing a bedwetting program though the Enurisis clinic for Nicole. It involves setting my alarm 3 or 4 times during the night and getting up and taking her to the toilet. Not much fun during winter. But the effort and exhaustion will be worth it in the end when my 6 and a half year old doesn't have to wear nappies at night anymore. She was pretty devastated when her friend made fun of her when she stayed the night during the holidays. Kids can be bitches too!
Aww Billy looked cute rolling around in the sun playing with his tail. I tried to take a picture but he is too far away and I couldn't make the brightness setting on the cam adjust so you could see him properly. Stoopid thing! LOL Oh well..
Though I must admit I'm finding this place rather confining at present. I had something really important happen in my life last week and something incredibly exciting is going to happen soon. Yet I don't feel comfortable discussing them here. Why? Because my online associates know of this place and I know some of them come here looking for 'the dirt'. Surely they understand that everything I publish here is something I've made a conscious decision to put out to them and whomever else chooses to read it.
I'm not going to bang on about spys and lurkers. This is a public blog, I want it to be read. Just some things, 'heart issues' don't need to be put out there for public scrutiny.
I had another learning curve over the past few days. Religion is one big messy, controversial motherfucking subject! By the way 'motherfucker' is my word of the week, impressive, hmm? Silly me thought I could have an open discussion with people about our beliefs. Anyways what I've learnt is to keep my mouth shut unless I'm prepared to be labeled judgmental for staying true to what I believe. It kind of makes me laugh. Don't people realize that making judgments is how we as humankind make decisions?
We take the information, evaluate it, see how it fits with our morals, beliefs, experiences and knowledge, then either embrace or discard. Is that a bad thing? Of course not! Its how we make decisions that are best for us.
This leads me to another BIG questionmark in my life....BDSM vs God. How does it fit? Does it fit? If it doesn't, which am I prepared to lose? Actually, I know the answer to that one. I want to know how it works.
I also want to know where I can buy a blow up sheep. But that's another story.
So back to why I'm online. I know a lot of it is 'the new house rules'. Which I hate with a passion, but have no control over and have to live with, along with the 'house' in question. So it leaves me bored and alone waaaaaay too much. Ideally I would have a new job, but I really don't see any point looking for one this close. So I guess I'm just biding time.
At the moment I'm doing a bedwetting program though the Enurisis clinic for Nicole. It involves setting my alarm 3 or 4 times during the night and getting up and taking her to the toilet. Not much fun during winter. But the effort and exhaustion will be worth it in the end when my 6 and a half year old doesn't have to wear nappies at night anymore. She was pretty devastated when her friend made fun of her when she stayed the night during the holidays. Kids can be bitches too!
Aww Billy looked cute rolling around in the sun playing with his tail. I tried to take a picture but he is too far away and I couldn't make the brightness setting on the cam adjust so you could see him properly. Stoopid thing! LOL Oh well..
posted by eMMa at 10:32 AM
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